1. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up".

2. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what YOU think."

3. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and copy them to your boss.

4. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy."

5. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.

6. Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences, producing awkward silences with the impression that you'll be saying more any moment.

7. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go".

8. Leave your turn signal on for fifty miles.

9. Name your dog "Dog" and your cat "Cat".

10. Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if people play along to avoid the appearance of ignorance.