Get out of the way of the Bride. Repeat. Get out of the way of the Bride. Seriously. In all likelihood, she has been waiting for this day and dreaming of her wedding for a long time. So, toss a few dozen or so bridal magazines at the bride and open communication on these subjects:
- Set a realistic budget: Food and wine. Invitations. Flowers. Gifts for the wedding party. No doubt about it, weddings are expensive. How expensive is up to you. Make a list of everything you think you might possibly need to spend money on. Double-check it with recently married friends to make sure you haven't forgotten anything. Then set a maximum amount you are willing to spend on each item. Add it up. This is your budget. You and your finance should show your budget to both sets of parents and have a discussion about who will be responsible for each charge. Will the parents give a set amount of money to "the cause" ? Do they expect you to cover some of the expenses? Which ones? Reassess your budget as necessary.
- Decide on location: The location of the wedding can dictate many of the expenses. If you find you can't afford a formal wedding at the country club, trim some things from your budget to see if you can make up the difference. Or, consider an informal wedding that doesn't, for example, require extensive decorations, a sit down dinner, or an ice sculpture. Destination weddings such as getting married at a beach, on a cruise, or in Paris are gaining popularity as a way to combine wedding and honeymoon expenses to save money and have a unique experience.
- Become a public relations expert: No doubt somebody's feelings will be hurt at some point in the planning process. Tough decisions will have to be made about inviting distant relatives, paying expenses, and who to invite to the wedding. Don't be overly aggressive. Keep you cool and try to be polite at all times. Many wedding guides offer sound advice for sticky situations. Those bridal magazines might come in handy after all!
- Relax: On the big day, plan a spa trip for the bridesmaids or a morning golf outing for the guys to promote bonding and erase any bad feelings. Delegate last minute details. Remember to thank everyone for making your big day special so that no matter how the wedding turns out, everyone will remember your good taste and graciousness.
